Allison Kilkenny: Unreported

You’re Welcome, Larry!

Posted in Uncategorized by allisonkilkenny on March 8, 2009

buddy_christ-3-copyAfter reading your thoughts on CPAC and Jonathan Krohn, I have come to this conclusion. If the good Lord was going to give the world an enema to rid the world of waste, I’m thoroughly convinced where he would stick the tube.

Thanks for helping the conservative cause going.

— Larry Reaves

6 Responses

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  1. Jeremy Cox said, on March 9, 2009 at 11:32 am

    I think he would stick the tube inside the mouths of the people who first translated the Bible into 1,000 different versions, thereby changing the meaning by changing the words, which prompted Christianity to split into 1,000 different denominations.

    And of course, each denomination individually thinks they’re better than the other 999, which prompts them to judge others and tell them what to read, and what not to listen to and what to watch, so you won’t be like that “other” denomination we used to be a part of, that will soon be burning in a “lake-a faaaar” because they don’t believe exactly what we do.

    And of course, that mindset prompts the “elite” of the newer, more conservative denominations to start writing legislation that serves their own agendas, while chanting anyone to Hell who doesn’t 100 percent believe them, and boycotting anything that doesn’t 100 percent fit their mold.

    That prompts the even MORE craziness, where certain sects break off and start Westboro Baptist Church, a group of people who think they’re the ONLY ones going to heaven, and think everyone else is a Hellbound fag.

    My belief? If there is a God, he is flipping off the entire planet right now for taking what was originally a good thing, and slowly butchering it into a chaotic mess of narcissism and judgement.

  2. allisonkilkenny said, on March 9, 2009 at 11:52 am

    Sooo..you’re saying my blog wouldn’t be a priority: yes/no?

  3. Jeremy Cox said, on March 9, 2009 at 12:00 pm

    No, it wouldn’t be…. Even Jesus agrees, Jonathan Krohn is on a fast track to becoming a bubbling cauldron of molten douche.

  4. allisonkilkenny said, on March 9, 2009 at 12:03 pm

    Honestly, I’d be flattered if The Lord came back to Earth, and I was numero uno on his list of “Shit I Need To Sort Out.”

  5. Jeremy Cox said, on March 9, 2009 at 12:16 pm

    I’ll have Robert “Fartin'” Tilton put a bug in God’s ear for you.

    And what is all this shit about “Thanks for helping the conservative cause” that Republicans spew constantly when they’re getting their asses kicked?

    I’ve heard the same snippy, bitter comeback from them on talk shows like “Real Time.”

    It’s like the adult equivalent of “I know you are, but what am I.”

  6. allisonkilkenny said, on March 9, 2009 at 12:39 pm

    It’s pretty silly: “Don’t fight back! C’mon, seriously! Just let us do what we want!”

    I imagine King George said something similar to the Founding Fathers: “Thanks for helping the monarchy’s cause, ingrates.”

    Politics is supposed to be a conflict of contrasting ideologies. Um, that’s sort of the whole point.


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